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The Ugliest Girl In Town has the dubious distinction of being one of television's famously bad programs (almost - but not quite - as bad as My Mother The Car). The premise was ludicrously complex: a young American lad decides to pose as a female model in order to stay with his British girlfriend, also a model, but is forced to continue the charade after the hoax is discovered.

The series was produced by Screen Gems in conjunction with Yardley of London, producer of various cosmetics and such. ABC scheduled it on Thursdays at 7:30PM, starting of a night of comedy including The Flying Nun, Bewitched and That Girl (plus the dramatic anthology series Journey to the Unknown -- a British import). The Ugliest Girl In Town aired opposite Blondie (the 1968 version) on CBS and Daniel Boone on NBC.

The series premiered on Thursday, September 26th, 1968 and was cancelled in mid-November after only eight episodes had aired. Nevertheless, an additional twelve episodes would be broadcast before the series was pulled. The final broadcast took place on January 30th, 1969, after which The Flying Nun took over The Ugliest Girl In Town's 7:30PM timeslot. Three episodes were left unaired by the network.

Peter Kastner starred as Timothy Blair, a young man working at Harper Talent Agency in the lowest capacity imaginable: he gets the sandwiches and makes delivery. While bringing a contract to Julie Renfield (Patricia Blake), a British actress filming a horror movie in the United States, Timothy fell in love with her.

After going to extraordinary lengths to get her to notice him, including running into the middle of a live commercial and grabbing the microphone to proclaim his love to her, Julie and Timothy fall madly in love. Sounds like your standard, run-of-the-mill "boy meets girl" scenario, right? Wrong.

Only a day after they meet Julie is to return to her native England. Timothy doesn't make enough money at his low level job to join her -- his paycheck is only $97 a week. On their first and only date he had to tip the waiter with his watch, for lack of any form of money.

Enter Gene Blair (played by Garry Marshall -- not the actor/producer, just the actor), Timothy's brother, who just so happens to be a photographer contracted to snap pictures of hippies for a London magazine. It took him two years to get a chance and he blows it by messing up. So, Gene dresses up his brother in a hippy outfit and snaps a few rolls of film to send off to the magazine.

As it turns out, the magazine loves the photos. The only problem is that, because of the length of the wig Gene gave Timothy, they believe he's a girl by the name of Timmie! "The pictures you sent us of that Timmie girl..."

They're expecting her to become the next big thing. Little do they know Timmie isn't so much a she as a he. Timothy and Gene pack their bags and fly to England for two weeks, where they find David Courtney (Nicholas Parsons), of Courtney Talent Agency, waiting for them, along with Julie, who doesn't recognize him until a little later.

Timothy is given a house by the Agency, still unaware of the two-week stay. Timmie and Julie go off on a wild modeling tour all over London. That evening, Mr. Courtney throws a party to which Timmie must attend, although it is Timothy who wants to enjoy himself. Gene, meanwhile, has fallen for Sondra Wolston (Jenny Till), Mr. Courtney's assistant.

Two weeks later, of course, Timothy and his brother are set to return to the States, the vacation over. Gene, however, somehow racks up quite a lot of debt so Timothy (and Timmie) is forced to stay in England to pay of his brother's debt.

At the same time, Mr. Courtney finds out what's really going on and threatens to throw Timothy in jail if he doesn't continue the charade until Courtney makes his money back. Therefore, the rouse continues and Timothy gets to stay in England with Julie.

With such an unusual premise the series had little trouble coming up with plots for episodes. What would happen if Timothy, posing as Timmie, was stuck in this situation? Or this one? Or that one? And so on and so forth.

For example, what would happen if Timmie were to sing? Or to pose nude? Plots were silly, but then again, so was the series. Poor Gene's gambling problem came back to bite the brothers in the bum. Another episode saw Timothy being called up for National Guard duty while still in London. Timmie would model by day and Timothy would be with Julie by night.

The theme song, sung by the Wall-o-Bees, is a catchy little ditty that will never be forgotten by anyone who hears it. Many people who watched the series when they were younger still recall the lyrics today. For a bit of trivia, the theme song was covered by The Paris Sisters, better known for such hits as "He Knows I Love Him Too Much" and "I Love How You Love Me."

All in all, The Ugliest Girl In Town was the epitome of sixties pop culture, with outrageous hats and outfits, bright colors, and trippy music. And it was filmed in London so at least the scenery was real. Sony even used the show to sell 7" portable televisions -- telling men that they an be watching what they want to watch while their wives are watching what they want to watch.

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Last Updated April 26th, 2006